In the depth of Winter

Albert Camus once wrote “in the depth of Winter, I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer,” and that’s kind of how I feel lately.

It’s been a while. Sorry for the break. Clearly, I’ve been trying to make my way through some Camus. Heh. I’ve been doing a lot of reading lately. Whenever I can find the time.

Sometimes life gets busy, especially when you work in advertising. The past week or so has been up and down. I’m choosing to look at the highs right now. Yesterday, I sat back and felt pride. Genuine pride, for the first time in a long long time. The past couple of years haven’t been an easy ride. Yesterday, I took stock.

The job is awesome. I left a permanent position at the university to work at an agency. But, I have to say, I couldn’t have made a better move. Great people, great support, and a lot of fun. A lot of work. But, a lot of fun. It’s a pleasure to walk in there each day.

I thought about how much I’ve grown as a man. How I’m able to take things in stride. Prior to this year the little things crept under my skin and had the power to really knock me off course. Send me into a tizzy. It would seem that I’ve reached a point where that isn’t so much an issue any more. I’m able to absorb and view things from a wider perspective these days.

I’ve found the kind of energy (not to sound new-age, but it’s true) that I want to be around. I’ve discovered the companionship of a lady who is unbelievably patient. And supportive. And understanding. And a lot of other words that aren’t coming into mind at the moment. Indefatigably strong. She pushes me to take the strides I need to take. And for that, I couldn’t be more grateful.

I’ve taken the negative, flushed it out, and replaced it with positives. Even if said negative wanted to creep back in, well, it’s damn near impossible to gain entry. The place is like fort knox.

And even on the days when I feel burdened. When the prospect of this evolution appears insurmountable. That voice that once sat in the back of my head and supported that doubt has been silenced. In its place is a new voice. One that’s loud and proud and is confident that I am able to do this.

When I stepped on the scale yesterday and clocked three more pounds, sure I was happy. But, the prospect of genuine health and happiness in all facets is now a reality. And that is worth more to me than any number you could name.

Bottom line: I’m still truckin’, and I’ve got some miles to go before I get there. But, the tank is full and I’m wide-awake.

4 thoughts on “In the depth of Winter

  1. Hey Dave, i heard your CBC Radio interview this morning… and I just read your entire blog. So the interview was good. Great stuff. Look forward to more you talented and smart frigger you!

  2. Your journey is an amazing feat of self awareness. I’m with you – food as medicine, food as a balm for what ails you, food as comfort. It’s difficult when your world can be so dark to struggle to see the light of common sense, of health, through the clouds. I’m glad you’ve seen it. I’m happy you’re on a path to a better life. I hope to join you on the other side. I’ll be staying tuned and drawing strength from your journey. No pressure though! Heh, Thank you. Thank you for being brave enough to put this out there.

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